Mixed Blessings

Give me rich foods or give me death. In a poll conducted for ABCNews, 75 percent of women and 70 percent of men said they'd be unwilling to eat fewer calories for the sake of living to a ripe old age. Irrespective of diet, respondents had little enthusiasm for extremely long life. Just 27 percent of women and 40 percent of men said they'd want to reach age 120. Among those who would like to live so long, 44 percent said they'd be willing to eat one-third fewer calories to make it that far.If people could run 60 miles per hour, lots of them would never buy a car. A Maritz Poll found 22 percent of adults saying they either "mildly dislike" or "hate" buying or leasing a car at a dealership. On the other hand, 41 percent said they "mildly enjoy" or "thoroughly enjoy" the process. Despite popular wisdom that says the car industry does a poor job of reaching out to women, female respondents were more likely than males to say they enjoy shopping for a car (45 percent vs. 36 percent). Women were correspondingly less likely than men to say they hate the experience (7 percent vs.15 percent). Among people who dislike or hate car-shopping, the chief irritants are "dealing with salespeople" (34 percent), "negotiating the final price" (26 percent), the "length of time it takes" (10 percent) and "arranging financing" (8 percent). When in doubt, make fun of ad agencies. A new campaign for Nabisco's Wheat Thins Crispy Thins exemplifies this approach. In one spot, we see the agency presenting a campaign to the client. The creative team is fronted by a woman who strums a guitar and sings an insipid jingle that touts the chip-thin cracker as a "chacker." When the exasperated client asks why they can't just say the product is baked like a cracker but thin and crispy like a chip, the sycophantic account executive burbles, "We can do that," even as he's being kicked under the table by a creative guy. Apparently the brand's real agency, J. Walter Thompson in New York, had a receptive audience when it presented this concept to its real client. Alarming Statistic of the Week: 81 percent of Americans feel they should write a book. A survey commissioned by Jenkins Group Inc., a Michigan-based publishing services firm, finds most of these would-be authors envision themselves writing a nonfiction tome. Twenty-eight percent would like to write a self-help/do-it-yourself book, while 27 percent cited general nonfiction (history, biography, etc.). Twenty-seven percent see themselves writing fiction. Naturally, the majority of these books will go unwritten, though Jenkins estimates that 6 million Americans have produced a manuscript. While airlines implore the feds to give them more aid, a poll suggests business travelers may provide some help. Fielded last month by Accenture, the survey found 35 percent of business travelers expect to get around more in the next six months than they did in the past six. Twenty-five percent think they'll travel less. Of course, even those who do travel won't be spending willy-nilly. Seventeen percent said they'll increase their use of low-fare carriers during the next six months; 13 percent said they'd already done so in the past six months. A majority (57 percent) plan to stay mainly in mid-price hotels, while 16 percent said they'll use luxury chain hotels. When it comes to picking travel services, 68 percent said loyalty programs affect their choices. Breasts have a long and glorious history in ads, but they seldom belong to someone as old as Mother Nature. Let us salute Columbia Sportswear, then, for invoking breasts in a fresh way while selling a parka that would conceal the shape of any woman, man or beast who wears it. The ad was created by Borders Perrin Norrander of Portland, Ore. Cell-phone etiquette (or lack thereof) continues to evolve. In a poll conducted by Wirthlin Worldwide for wireless retailer LetsTalk, 46 percent of adults said it's OK to talk on a cell phone in a car. Seventy-six percent said so in a poll in 2000. Talking on a cell phone in a restaurant was acceptable to28 percent (vs. 31 percent in 2000), and45 percent said it's all right to do it on public transportation (down from 52 percent).In 25 years, a film festival accumulates a lot of stock characters. What if they all gathered for a reunion? That's the concept behind advertising for the 25th Mill Valley Film Festival, via Hill, Holliday, Connors,Cosmopulos in San Francisco. Nametags identify the characters. Thus, we see Hooker With a Heart of Gold greeting the guests, while Inspirational Teacher chats with Lonely Child Prodigy and Pill-Popping Suburban Housewife schmoozes with Wise-Cracking Convenience Store Owner. Other attendees include Ghetto Mom Tryin' to Make It and Racist Who Learns a Lesson.

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Mixed Blessings

Mark Dolliver

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Mark Dolliver