Going, Going, Gone!

Headshot of Tim Nudd

Tampax? Liquid-Plumr? Manwich?

Any way you slice it, it’s a slimy move, and the kid’s not even born yet (as of this writing, anyway).

We refer, of course, to the blusterous antics of Jason Black and Frances Schroeder, the New York parents-to-be who are auctioning their unborn son’s first name on eBay and Yahoo! to the highest corporate bidder. These folks really have their Head & Shoulders up their Aspercreme, if you catch our drift. But dollar signs dance in their heads.

“It’s the opportunity to have this media moment when the name would be unveiled,” Black told the AP last week. “The exposure that it could bring to a business is potentially huge.” As for the boy’s sanity? “As long as we provide him with a comfortable and loving home, he’s going to turn out fine,” Black said. That’s probably true, considering he won’t be able to leave the house.

Reportedly, no one had bid the $500,000 as of late last week. Still, in the spirit of marketing goofiness—any goofiness, damn it—we’d like to give you corporate-IDers a chance to weigh in. Send us your ideas for the best name (Tnudd@adweek.com). We can’t promise much to the winner, but you’ll take the edge off what might just be the beginning of the end of the world as we know it.

@nudd Tim Nudd is a former creative editor of Adweek.