Mother Insists that Your Kids Attend its Anniversary

By Erik Oster 


A tipster provided us with Mother’s rather unusual invite to current and former workers for the agency’s anniversary party. Addressed to “Dearest Son or Daughter,” (that would be employees) from “The Grand Mothers” (partners) it appears the agency leaders would like to gather their children to “run our fingers though the hair of our sons and daughters.” Oh, and it would appear they are not a fan of the plus-one. We’ve included the invite in full below.

Dearest Son or Daughter,

You are cordially summoned by Mother to eat supper and party.

Ten *cough* eleven long years have passed since the dawn of our first day. To honor the beginning of a new decade, give or take a year, we are gathering all those who have served at the House of Mother.

Time demands that we run our fingers though the hair of our sons and daughters. That we talk with them and see how they’ve grown.

Join us and be reborn on the 11th day in the month of December at the hour of 8 o’clock. That’ll make you a Sagittarius.

We shall raise a glass and drink the blood of grapes and hops and be merry. We shall probably have a good time. Join your fellow siblings (no outsiders or plus ones please) and let us share embraces, memories and a wild night.

For All Maternity,

The Grand Mothers-
Paul, Tom, Andrew, Michael, Pernilla

The High Line Hotel
180 10th Ave
New York, NY 10011
Thursday December 11th