Carat’s Email Scandal Makes Us Want To Hurl

By SuperSpy 

Lay-offs are coming to Carat. Staffers were informed via a corporate classic email slip-up. An HR executive accidentally emailed the ENTIRE agency about upcoming cuts from the rosters.

No shit. Some tipster told major ad press outlet AdAge and they broke the story. Hey guys! Where’s the love?

The entire document, which is a whopping six pages long. Download Carats Bad News It includes everything from how to deal with the press to this sad sick of shit apology letter, which mangers are to send to their axed reports. Seriously, you’re going to send these people a chintzy little letter? Big, big fuck you to Carat. That’s right. I’m cursing! I’m cursing goddammit!

“I uUnfortunately [sic], I have some difficult news which that [sic] affects you and your position with the company. Based on the continued reduction in our client’s’ [sic] spend and a restructuring of the core functions (insert group here, we had to evaluate a number of factors and took take a hard look at our future and current current and future business needs (capacity), performance, and the evolving skill sets needed for our clients and their businesses. As a result, we no longer have a role for you. This was a very difficult decision which that is affecting a number of people across Carat the entire organization. Your last day with the company will be _____________.

I know this is difficult news to handle. I want you to know that we have prepared some information that I would like to review with you now. This is important information concerning your severance, medical benefits and outplacement assistance. This is the package we have arrangedarrange [sic] for anyone affected by a reduction in staff such as this.

Please know that we value your contribution to the company and want to help you as with your transition into the next stage of your professional career. Let’s review your package and make sure you understand what we have provided. We also have outplacement services to offer you as a part of your transition if you are interested in taking advantage of that service.

If you would like to go home today and come back tomorrow to clean out your desk or office, you are free to do so. We would like you to meet with your manager following our meeting to transition your work. We will be communicating to your team today. Your manager will be contacting clients. We ask that you do not contact your any clients to discuss this situation. As Since this is affecting a number of people, we will be communicating to the office later today what has occurred.

Please review the materials that we have provided for you. You have one week (or 45 days depending on situation) to review your severance agreement, sign it and return it to me. In the meantime, don’t hesitate to call me if you have any questions.”

Look, I know people get laid off, but do it with some humanity for god sake.

Wanna talk to us? Email at: agencyspy at gmail dot com for Mat.
Or, superspyin at gmail dot com for SuperSpy. Or hell, use the comments or tip box, too.

More: Campbell-Ewald’s Mandate To Laid-Off Employees