Advice for Young Mothers in Advertising, From Other Moms

The Mad Men-era is long gone, but its roots permeate to the present day and make it especially challenging to be a woman, and a mother, in the advertising industry. Statistically, working women take on more caregiving duties for their children than working men. This means women are expected to do more in a world where, on average, employers pay them less than their male counterparts. During the mass school closures caused by the pandemic, agency environments became untenable for many mothers, causing a number of them to choose to leave the field. But even before that, women left the industry in high numbers upon having children. In a fast-paced environment, rife with clients' demands and pressure to move up the so-called professional ladder quickly, there are still fewer women than men leading or founding agencies. It makes it hard for early-career women to find support, or relate to, their leaders, and so the cycle continues. Ahead of this Mother's Day, Adweek spoke to five mothers in agency leadership. They shared advice for new moms who are navigating the complex and challenging worlds of agency life and motherhood. These interviews have been lightly edited for length and clarity. What is your advice for young mothers in the industry? Cathy Butler, CEO of Organic: I don't ever miss a music performance or a Little League game or a doctor’s appointment. I always take their birthdays off and book it in my calendar. But in equal measure, I deliver quality work and make sure that if I have to leave early or if I'm not there on any particular day, that my work and my team don't suffer because of it. On some days I have to prioritize a new business pitch, or I prioritize going to a marching band event. I feel great about both of those things. Danielle Gonzales, North America CEO of iProspect: Give yourself grace and forgive yourself. I think the hardest thing about being a mother, period, but being a working mother as well, is most of us have such high expectations of ourselves and we've been so successful in different walks of life, with very high standards. What happens when you become a mother for the first time? It's such a big experience that you often think that you're not cutting it, or you're not doing a good job, or that you're falling short somehow. Laura Breines, president of Big Spaceship: It is hard. Ask for help. That is absolutely not a sign of being a bad mom, a bad employee or a bad partner. It is very rewarding to have a career and a family. I would not want it any other way. But wanting that means that you should be open to leaning on family, friends and many other things in between to make sure that you're doing all of those things the best way you can. Jasmine Dadlani, head of strategy at McKinney: Realize that you do so much in your day that is valuable and beneficial as a mother that you can bring to your job. So whether you're a mom trying to get back into the industry and you have a resume gap, or whether you're working every day already, definitely feel that there's so much more value that you bring because you're a mom, as opposed to feeling like it's in any way a deficiency in your career. How have you prioritized work-life balance and how can new mothers accomplish this in such a fast-paced industry? Butler: Balance isn't necessarily 50% every day—for parenting or for work. I think it comes on a day-to-day basis, and you have to make a decision. There are some days where it's just busy, and there are children's demands that need to be met. Like, I have a sick kid, or I need to take them to the doctor or I have a Little League game to go to, and that is my priority.Bernstein: I didn't find work-life balance as a young mother. I was the founder of a young agency at the same time as being a young mother. It’s so much easier now to build your day around professional and personal priorities. I think mothers are in the driver's seat. I think that we are professionals who have insight, who have experience, who have a level of perspective and productivity because we are able to juggle so much. There's a level of maturity. There's a level of understanding. Our value has grown in the industry. We need to pick the places that allow us to prioritize our personal and professional priorities equally. Gonzales: It's very individualized, so it's hard to say that there's one way to do it. But to me, each individual has to find, "what are the top 10 things I must do?" And then that becomes your prioritization list. Within those top 10 things, it could be attending your six year old’s dance recital, it could be taking him to the dentist or it could be turning in a major presentation to a client. Stress just becomes more and more as you move up the ladder. But what I found is, instead of trying to say no to things, I try to say yes to things that fill me up. Instead of saying "I can't do XY and Z" at work, I try to find my balance by adding things that are important to me. So more family time, or like, I'm going to make it a commitment to do dinner every night this week. Breines: My decision was that I knew I did not want to have kids young. Focusing on my career in my 20s was really important to me. That is not advice I would give someone else because that's such a personal decision. So I can only speak for what I decided was right for me, which was to wait and to have kids, and have a child later in my 30s. So my career had already been established. You know, I had the ability to have a team that could help me through maternity leave with proper coverage and all that sort of stuff. What employer-sponsored or industry resources have you utilized to make it easier to be a parent and an agency employee? Butler: The truth is, I don't think I would have had time to flex those resources. The resources that were most helpful to me were moms in the organizations, and asking for help, asking for additional support, asking for what I needed and advocating for myself. I found that to be the most welcome and to be the most successful for me. The reality is, it's very difficult to take care of yourself, to take care of your family and anyone else in your orbit, without taking advice from folks who have gone through it before. Bernstein: The thing about mothers is that you learn from each other and you often learn from the mothers who are just a bit ahead of you. If it's your first child, you want to be talking to a friend who's had kids and who have hit the milestones before you. They can share and help guide each of those steps. Gonzales: I really started by going to HR and asking them, "what's available for new moms? Is there an expectant-parent kit? What happens when I come back?" Just asking a ton of questions. Also there's resource groups, through a lot of companies’ health benefits, that help with counseling. If you might be experiencing postpartum depression or just struggling throughout pregnancy because, gosh, your life is sort of turned upside down, and how you feel and operate. To me, the most important group is the HR group—just being an advocate for yourself and asking a ton of questions until you can get the answers that you need. Dadlani: It's really about community and being part of communities of other working mothers, where you can share tips and tricks and advice. I personally am a member of a couple different organizations. HeyMama is one of them. Try to join as many of those events—and be a mentor—but also try to get advice from others. It’s really about forming and finding your community and just leaning hard on that village. As Burnout Grips Agency Parents, They're Desperate for Help From Their Leaders