Hot Pockets only yearning to be eaten freely

You always knew it was wrong to eat a Hot Pocket. That massive injection of hot meat and cheese, known to function like a bowl of Colon Blow, just couldn't be right. But the brand's new "Eat freely" campaign shows the real reason Hot Pockets lovers are shunned is because they don't eat at a table. I think it's an excellent angle. If you're the sort of person who's inclined to eat Hot Pockets, you don't want people preaching about chairs, tables or your soaring cholesterol. You just want to be free: free to enjoy that molten processed cheese anytime you like. I envy these free eaters, unconfined by plates, knives or tight clothing. Free eaters even refuse to be confined by laws: has a list of at least six real food-related laws that Hot Pockets would like to strike from the books. But the real reason to like the campaign is that they dropped the dojo gong and brought back the jingle at the end. Sing it with me now: Hot Pockets!

—Posted by Rebecca Cullers


See also:
Wax on, wax off with Hot Pockets master