The Onion News Network to Debut in January

By Alex Weprin 

Come January, there will be a new cable news outlet in town. The Onion News Network will premiere on IFC January 21 at 10 PM, the network says.

ONN is a TV spin-off of the popular web series, which is itself a spin-off of the satirical newspaper The Onion. While The Onion mocks the often stodgy newspaper business, ONN mocks the bombastic world of cable news:


Onion News Network – Coming To IFC January 2011

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Yes, in the trailer you may have noticed former Fox News Channel breaking news anchor Suzanne Sena, who plays the ONN lead anchor “Brooke Alvarez” in the show.

More information, including the ONN versions of Glenn Beck and Nancy Grace, after the jump.

Onion News Network (www.ifc.com/ONN) brings The Onion’s (www.onionnewsnetwork.com) unparalleled brand of hard-hitting, merciless journalism to television-watching masses. As the nation’s number-one source for breaking news, screaming political arguments and vital information on missing teenage Caucasian girls, Onion News Network will showcase the network’s top-rated prime time show, a hyperactive graphics and sound effect-laden news explosion called “FactZone with Brooke Alvarez,” hosted by the world’s most respected news-reader. The character of Brooke Alvarez is played by Suzanne Sena, best known for her work as an entertainment reporter and host on E! and a breaking news anchor on the Fox News Channel. Brooke’s co-host, Tucker Hope, is played by Todd Alan Crain, who recently became the fourth person to ever host Jeopardy!.

Able to seamlessly segue from a grisly death to a cute animal story in the blink of a stunningly beautiful eye, Brooke Alvarez anchors “FactZone” with the help of her eager-to-please co-host Tucker Hope, the recipient of several industry awards for skilled manipulation of his high-tech touch-screen monitor, The Recon Wall 4000. Together they tackle important stories like “Kim Jong Il Shuts Down North Korean Nuclear Program In Exchange For Lead Role In Next Batman Film” and “Supreme Court Repeals Annoying Loudmouth’s First Amendment Rights.”

Through clips on Onion News Network, viewers will get a glimpse of the 24-hour channel’s vast programming line-up, which includes:

Today Now! – Co-hosts Jim Haggerty and Tracy Gill try out new recipes and find out what’s killing America’s children on the Onion News Network’s top-rated morning show.

The Cressbeckler Stance with Joad Cressbeckler – Angry political commentator Joad Cressbeckler opines on everything from returning to the gold standard to skinning a raccoon.

Star Fix – The lovely Madison Daly gives celebrity-addicted Americans their desperately needed dose of entertainment news.

Cross Examination with Shelby Cross – Former prosecutor Shelby Cross reports on the latest legal cases, determining who’s guilty without the need for pesky evidence.

Eye On America – The Onion News Network taps one of their 12,408 local affiliates for a glimpse at what’s happening with the little people out there in the fly-over states.

Onion News Network is executive produced by Will Graham, Julie Smith and Jim Biederman as well as IFC’s Debbie DeMontreux, Christine Lubrano, Jennifer Caserta and Evan Shapiro.

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