Bill Simmons Speaks Out of Both Sides of His Mouth

By Noah Davis Comment

I like Bill Simmons. I really do. Perhaps it’s the whole being from Massachusetts thing, the same gene that made me required to spend $14 seeing The Town the first week it was in theaters. But more than that, I think his longevity is impressive. Sure, he’s dropped the number of columns for podcasts, but the dude’s written multiple 4,000-word columns a week for going on 10 years now. The quality is variable – as it is with any columnist – but he’s a machine.

Sometimes though, he needs to be called out. His column today is one of those times.

Simmons explains his enjoyment of the Michael Vick rejuvenation. Fine. Perhaps unpalatable with some people, but it’s his opinion and it’s not out of line. Vick served his time, rehabilitated himself, and deserves another shot.

Then there’s this paragraph:

Sure, the schedule broke perfectly for him: two garbage-time quarters against Green Bay, then gimme games against Jacksonville and Detroit (two of the league’s worst teams). We haven’t seen him face an aggressive, hungry defense yet. But anyone who says Vick didn’t distinguish himself these first three weeks is lying. There’s no quarterback quite like him; not now, not five years ago, not five years from now. He’s an original prototype. During his occasionally electric Jacksonville performance, Vick made one play that instantly made me picture my friend Whitlock giggling on his sofa and typing a “Michael Vick is doing his damned thang!” tweet. Sure enough, the tweet popped up on my feed a few seconds later. How many football players resonate quite like that?

But Bill, before the Detroit game you said you weren’t impressed with his play when you were hosting PTI. Your argument was something like “he’s played six good quarters. I’m not convinced.” Are you saying four more quarters in a “gimme game” against one of “the league’s worst” team convinced you that Vick is back?

Sorry, you can’t have it both ways.