If you're at all like me, you've probably wondered what Barack Obama and Mitt Romney would look like in meat-sculpture form. Well, now we know. Jack Link's and ad agency Carmichael Lynch commissioned mosaic artist Jason Mecier to serve up portraits of both men created from 50 bags of beef jerky each. Now, why didn't Fox News think of that? This was a big-tent effort, with Jack's entire line—Sweet & Hot, Original Smokehouse, Turkey Jerky—getting in on the act. The president of the United States is referred to as Barack Obameat, while his Republican challenger is Meat Romney. (Jack Link's lucked out, because Beef Gingrich just doesn't have the same ring to it. Jerk Santorum, however, sounds just about right.) Mecier also created a meat mosaic of the brand's Sasquatch mascot, which is "running" against the other two portraits as part of a $5,000 contest. Vote for your favorite on Jack Link's website  or Facebook page  … waste your whole life, for all I care. Sorry, I'm in a pissy mood because the best meat puns already have been used by other media. HuffPo went with "Hail to the beef." Damn, that's solid. You know, it's a shame Jack Link's had to work with such a limited palette. These are politicians, so it might've been more apropos if they'd been rendered in pork. Or tongue.