I've long suspected that driving people around a track so fast and with such ferocity that it makes them scared and nauseous would be a good way to stop them from accomplishing tasks that require concentration and/or fine motor skills. Deutsch LA proves me right in these "Fast vs. Fast" videos,  which pit Volkswagen's GTI, Golf R and Jetta GLI models against a quartet of YouTube stars known for doing stuff extremely quickly. In each spot, a speedster gets buckled in for an intense, gut-churning one-lap ride with pro driver Eric Norris. (He's Chuck's son, though I'm sure his family connections have nothing to do with his getting to drive fast cars and play the "celeb" role in commercials instead of being, oh I don't know, a blogger.) Each passenger fails to perform his or her specialty before the lap is completed. The world's fastest female speed talker (her folks must be proud) gets too shaken up to recite the entire Gettysburg Address. Guitarist John Taylor attempts to play "Flight of the Bumblebee," but, according to VW, "he got so sick after the first few takes around the raceway that we had to re-order the shots to give him a break." Bottom line: You may wish the airbags were barf bags, but these VWs are still way cooler than the Chevy Volt.  More spots after the jump.