David Foster Wallace Footnotes Horatio Alger

By Jason Boog 

joesluck.jpgAs we enter the final week of our World’s Longest Literary Remix contest, submissions are still pouring in–including editor Meryl Gross‘ elegant use of David Foster Wallace’s effusive footnotes to brighten up a dull patch of a novel. Read her complete submission after the jump.

Gross joined a brave crew of readers in rewriting one page from a Horatio Alger novel for fun and prizes–read his entry after the jump. 150 pre-registered GalleyCat Reviews readers have signed up to rewrite one page of Joe’s Luck: Always Wide Awake (cover pictured, via).

We will publish the remixed text as a free digital book. Each remix contributor will be eligible for a random drawing of special giveaway prizes. If you want to participate in the next remix contest, email GalleyCat to get on the list.

Three excellent sponsors have donated prizes: 1-Scribd.com and Blurb.com are donating 10 printed copies of the completely remixed novel, using the company’s new print-on-demand service.

2- The remixing experts at Quirk Books will give one lucky winner an assortment of Quirk Classics books, posters, and audiobooks–a prize package worth over $100.

3-The multimedia literary journal Electric Literature will donate “Electric Literature: Year One”–a complete set of the first four issues of the journal–a $40 value.


Horatio Alger Versus David Foster Wallace (or, Applying the David Foster Wallace Footnote Technique)
By Meryl Gross

He tore himself from Joe’s grasp and went on board the steamer. Our
hero, provoked, was about to follow him, when the officer said:
“Stand back! You have no ticket.” *

Two young men, handsomely dressed and apparently possessed of larger means than the great majority of the passengers, got out of a hack and paused close to where Joe was standing.

“Dick,” said one, “I’m really sorry you are not going with me. I
shall feel awfully lonely without you.”

“I am very much disappointed, Charlie, but duty will keep me at home.
My father’s sudden, alarming sickness has broken up all my plans.”

* The officer, a man of alarming girth and completely devoid of hair and humor, closed his eyes in despair. What’s wrong with people today? he thought. This idiot thinks he can just board my ship willy-nilly without a ticket. Some other man bought a ticket with his money? Does this addle-pated youngster think that I’ve just fallen off the turnip truck? But now the officer’s mind drifted. Ignoring the hubbub and blather roiling about him, he started thinking about Millie. Ah, Millie…. Millie with hair like a sunset, Millie with the neck of a gazelle, Millie with the thirty-four yapping Pomeranian dogs… If only she hadn’t undertaken the task of rewriting Ancient Egyptian for the Deaf he’d be a happier man today. Suddenly the officer was startled out of his reverie by the arrival of two young men chattering inanely. Tonight, he was certain, it would be laudanum or the window.

Meryl Gross’ background and training is in the fine arts (mostly sculpture) which is how she came to be the associate managing editor of a large science fiction/fantasy imprint of some repute.

UPDATE: Here is a link to the completely remixed novel.

Joe’s Luck: The World’s Longest Literary Remix