The Greening of Al Gore


By Dylan Comment

Last night we attended the opening New York screening of An Inconvenient Truth, Al Gore‘s well-hyped, slow-burning documentary about global warming. We flirted with the idea of pulling up in a fleet of hybrid cabs (of which there are — get this — just 27 operating in NYC) but decided the 8-block trek from the office was walkable. But that didn’t stop us from spraying 17 cans worth of aerosol and clubbing an oil-dipped baby seal to death on the walk over.

In general, the documentary was scarier than Al Gore on the cover of Wired. But we figured it would be.

A few things we didn’t know before the movie:

  • Al Gore is a borderline PowerPoint expert.
  • There are computer-generated polar bears swimming near the ice caps right now, helplessly searching for the next ice chunk raft to float on.
  • Gore doesn’t like to refer to George W. Bush by name, opting for “the President” or “this administration.”
  • If we don’t change our wasteful ways, it is gonna suck to be a relative of someone living in Florida — ‘cuz they’re moving into your guest room when this sh*t goes down. Lower Manhattan is f*cked, too.
  • Scratch that “borderline” comment — Gore is a PowerPoint pimp. He’s the David Byrne of ex-politicos.
  • Even in front of a small group, Gore does not have a dynamic stage presence, relying on an Ali-like rope-a-dope method of lulling you into a point.
  • If Apple didn’t give the film’s producers funding or sponsorship, then Apple is getting what is perhaps the cheapest 100-minute advertisement in the history of advertising, courtesy of Gore and his omnipresent iBook.
  • Theaters that show An Inconvenient Truth will be the cleanest theaters after a movie you’ve ever seen.
  • We’re buying a bike tomorrow.

    An Inconvenient Truth
    EARLIER: The New Magazine Cover Aesthetic: Scare Us
    Al Gore and Wired‘s Art Director Ruin My Grape Nuts

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