Attention: Desperate Freelancers

Last week I accidentally discovered a sure-fire way to get offered an unsolicited assignment from one of those local upscale lifestyle magazines. You know, the kind named after exclusive Westside neighborhoods that often feature cover stories on Scientology-affiliated movie stars. Call up the publisher and say that you’re a media journalist investigating a report of upheaval among the magazine’s editorial staff. The publisher may threaten you with a lawsuit, but he’ll also offer you work in return for squashing the story.