“Are you f*cking kidding me?!”
When we first clicked on this story about a study telling marketers how to target women “when they feel their worst”, we knew it had to be a joke.
However, upon reviewing the accompanying infographic we have determined that it is very, very real. The study was apparently created by the PHD Worldwide agency (part of the totally awesome new Publicom-Omnicus-whatever-the-hell-they’re-calling-it merger), which even pushed out a press release today.
Let’s pick out some of the very worst quotes, shall we?
- “Women feel ugliest on Mondays and weekends”
- “Sunday [took] the number two slot on the ‘ugly day’ index”
- “In this scenario, Monday becomes the day to encourage the beauty product consumer to get going and feel beautiful again”
- Study participants describing themselves as “feeling lonely, fat, and depressed” during periods like “when I wake up,” “when it’s hot as hell and I’m sweating” and “after crying”
- “While the study was designed to provide insights to marketers, the results may be valuable on an interpersonal level as well – especially for anyone who may need to speak to a woman on a Monday morning.”
Oh God, that last line. Might as well throw in a quote about “that time of the month” while you’re at it.
This strategy is all about using the reverse psychology of “beauty vulnerability”, and we know the study isn’t a big shocker because the art of playing on an audience’s insecurity has been the “dirty secret” of the ad industry since, like, forever. The worse you feel, the easier it is for these people to swoop in and tell you how their products, and only their products, can help.
But it still feels…what’s the word we’re looking for…oh right: evil. Yep, that’s it.