NPR: Never Promote Rivalries

Really: There’s nothing worse than watching NPR-types try to trash talk.

But, for all their sweet, soft, lulling-you-to-sleep-with-Schweddy Balls talk, people at NPR sure can get all worked up like Elvis over some things.

Especially when it comes to the annual NPR Holiday Relay (when teams representing various desks, shows, and departments spring around the headquarters, acting like fools). It ended a few minutes ago…and the NPR Music Team won.

Join us after the jump for some internal, trash-talking NPR emails leading up to the event…(who knew that “All Things Considered” had such ‘tude?!?)


    From: Traci Broadway
    Sent: Wednesday, December 03, 2008 11:55 AM
    To: Cory (David) Turner; Alison MacAdam; Brendan Banaszak; Greg Dixon; Sonari Glinton; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev Calamur; Neal Carruth

    Subject: Challenge!

    Good morning All. I am Traci Broadway, Financial Operations Manager for Digital Media. However, I’m writing you as Member, Holiday Planning Committee.

    The 8 of you are officially being CHALLENGED (capitalized for emphasis)!

    Digital News, now known as the Fightin’ CarDIGologists are challenging you (2 teams of 4) to the annual NPR holiday relay this Friday, December 5th at 11am.

    It really won’t take much of your time and this race is really heating up to be one of the greats. Beijing-like quality athletes, right here at our own NPR, are gearing up for this event.

    Fightin’ Cardiologists (Captain Jeffrey Katz)

    Erin Killian

    Andrew Prince

    Erica Ryan

    Brian Reed

    They were challenged by The Art Attack a.k.a. Beth Novey, Bridget Bentz, Spencer Thanhouser, and Ben Platt.

    Your participation would be greatly appreciated and remembered! Please let me know your teams of 4 asap and your team name can come a bit later.

    Thanks again,

    Traci

    *****************************************

    From: Greg Dixon
    Sent: Wednesday, December 03, 2008 6:15 PM
    To: Traci Broadway; Cory (David) Turner; Alison MacAdam; Brendan
    Banaszak; Sonari Glinton; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev Calamur; Neal
    Carruth
    Cc: Erin Killian
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    Challenge accepted! Ali, Neal, Krish and I will make up team “Consider Our Dust, Jerks!”

    So that’s one team of 4. I think everyone else on this email is sitting this one out ‘cuz they’re scared. Who can blame them?

    -Greg

    *****************************************

    From: Erin Killian
    Sent: Wed 03/12/2008 6:27 PM
    To: Greg Dixon; Traci Broadway; Cory (David) Turner; Alison MacAdam;
    Brendan Banaszak; Sonari Glinton; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev Calamur;
    Neal Carruth
    Cc: Andrew Prince; Erica Ryan; Brian Reed; Jeffrey Katz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    I don’t blame ’em for being scared.

    Be prepared to be destroyed. We have a practice scheduled for tomorrow, and I’m bringing in a whistle and a stopwatch!

    Erin Killian

    Producer

    NPR Digital News

    *****************************************

    From: Alison MacAdam
    Sent: Wed 12/3/2008 8:43 PM
    To: Erin Killian; Greg Dixon; Traci Broadway; Cory (David) Turner;
    Brendan Banaszak; Sonari Glinton; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev Calamur;
    Neal Carruth
    Cc: Andrew Prince; Erica Ryan; Brian Reed; Jeffrey Katz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    oooh. practice.

    “Consider Our Dust, Jerks” requires no practice. Of course, that’s
    because we all get up at 4am and run wind sprints before reading ALL the papers (just like sarah palin).

    *****************************************

    From: Brian Reed
    Sent: Wednesday, December 03, 2008 9:23 PM
    To: Alison MacAdam; Erin Killian; Greg Dixon; Traci Broadway; Cory
    (David) Turner; Brendan Banaszak; Sonari Glinton; Chelsea Jones;
    Krishnadev Calamur; Neal Carruth
    Cc: Andrew Prince; Erica Ryan; Jeffrey Katz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    I ran home 3.4 miles today in 12:34…with 30 pound weights on my
    ankles…blindfolded…earplugged…up a 60 degree hill…towing several large schoolchildren behind me in a Radio Flyer.

    I hope you’re ready.

    *****************************************

    From: Brendan Banaszak
    Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 9:38 AM
    To: Brian Reed; Alison MacAdam; Erin Killian; Greg Dixon; Traci
    Broadway; Cory (David) Turner; Sonari Glinton; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev
    Calamur; Neal Carruth
    Cc: Andrew Prince; Erica Ryan; Jeffrey Katz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    Alright, we will not be taunted. ATC is fielding TWO teams. Sonari,
    Chelsea, Cory (although he doesn’t know it yet) and myself will be the other team.

    -brendan

    *****************************************
    From: Erin Killian
    Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 9:57 AM
    To: Brendan Banaszak; Brian Reed; Alison MacAdam; Greg Dixon; Traci
    Broadway; Cory (David) Turner; Sonari Glinton; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev
    Calamur; Neal Carruth
    Cc: Andrew Prince; Erica Ryan; Jeffrey Katz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    Great. If you find that Cory is too much of a wuss, you can get anyone else to join your (already weak) team.

    Erin Killian
    Producer
    NPR Digital News

    *****************************************

    From: Brendan Banaszak
    Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 10:00 AM
    To: Erin Killian; Brian Reed; Alison MacAdam; Greg Dixon; Traci
    Broadway; Cory (David) Turner; Sonari Glinton; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev
    Calamur; Neal Carruth
    Cc: Andrew Prince; Erica Ryan; Jeffrey Katz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    Ouch…

    We’ll see who is dishing out the taunts after ‘Brendan and the Kick Your BanASSzaks’ leave you all in a sobbing, broken mess somewhere near the loading dock.

    *****************************************

    From: Sonari Glinton
    Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 10:01 AM
    To: Brendan Banaszak; Erin Killian; Brian Reed; Alison MacAdam; Greg
    Dixon; Traci Broadway; Cory (David) Turner; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev
    Calamur; Neal Carruth
    Cc: Andrew Prince; Erica Ryan; Jeffrey Katz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    And then for fun…we’ll produce an award winning radio documentary
    about how we did it.

    *****************************************

    From: Erin Killian
    Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 10:08 AM
    To: Sonari Glinton; Brendan Banaszak; Brian Reed; Alison MacAdam; Greg
    Dixon; Traci Broadway; Cory (David) Turner; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev
    Calamur; Neal Carruth
    Cc: Andrew Prince; Erica Ryan; Jeffrey Katz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    Do you really want have your sobbing, slobbering self on air?

    Erin Killian
    Producer
    NPR Digital News

    *****************************************

    From: Sonari Glinton
    Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 10:30 AM
    To: Erin Killian; Brendan Banaszak; Brian Reed; Alison MacAdam; Greg
    Dixon; Traci Broadway; Cory (David) Turner; Chelsea Jones; Krishnadev
    Calamur; Neal Carruth
    Cc: Andrew Prince; Erica Ryan; Jeffrey Katz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    You’re clever but clever don’t run.

    *****************************************

    From: Elizabeth Novey
    Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 10:47 AM
    To: Traci Broadway; Bridget Bentz
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    Man. There’s a lot of pent-up aggression at ATC.

    Beth Novey
    NPR Digital Media

    *****************************************

    From: Bridget Bentz
    Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 10:51 AM
    To: Traci Broadway; Elizabeth Novey
    Subject: RE: Challenge!

    Let them get distracted by each other while Art Attack blasts by…

    *****************************************

    Budget line for Friday All Things Considered story:

    DigitalArts Demolishes DigitalNews In NPR Holiday Race

    ATC 2-way. Sportswriter Stefan Fatsis talks with Michelle Norris about sports and the business of sports — and the business of losing sporting events to the Digital Arts team. Further analysis from Frank Deford re: Why is DigitalNews always picked last in gym class? Text and photos and an interactive graphic titled, “No, DigitalNews, interactive graphics don’t count as cardiovascular workouts.” Web text expected to come in late … just like DigitalNews relay team. In-depth Q&A for benefit of NPR listeners: “What are sports?”

    Beth Novey
    NPR Digital Media