Microsoft 10’s Cortana Already Needs an Update After Clowning Her CEO

A phone with snark. What could go wrong?

The news has broken: Microsoft is about to become relevant again because Cortana is here.

Sure, she has a funky name like Siri, but it has meaning–at least to the gaming community. Cortana is the name of the technological helper in the popular XBOX saga (a Microsoft Corporation). Granted, the game is half a millennia in the future, but there’s that.

Earlier this week, Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella gave a keynote speech at Dreamforce, Salesforce’s annual hoopla festival for users. During his speech, he tried to use artificial intelligence to provided a segue way into how fabulous Cortana really can be for said users.

Unfortunately, they created her to have an attitude…and it showed. In front of thousands of people. Business Insider provides the overview:

dreamforceBut then he asked Cortana, “Show me my most at-risk opportunities,” and the software surfaced reminders to buy milk instead.

Nadella gave it a second try, but it failed to understand him again, causing a frustrated Nadella to say, “Oh man!” at one point.

As he failed a third time, Nadella seemed a bit frustrated, and apologized to the crowd, “Sorry about that. Someone’s trying to save me from backstage.”

Eventually, on his next try, he changed his query to “show me the most risky opportunities,” and was able to get it to work.

While Nadella goes back to the drawing board and kicks a few of his engineers in the butt, Cortana is a candidate for one of the worst launches in PR history. Back in July, credible sources were declaring the death of the Windows Phone.

Pity, because now Cortana has a voice without a vehicle.

[PHOTO CREDIT: The Verge, Business Insider]