It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s a scarry-skinny, cold ingenue!

bosworth_crop.jpgTwo irrefutable truths have emerged from the premier of Superman Returns: 1. The new movie, like, totally rocks, and 2. Kate Bosworth is as personable as paste.

While fans (and even some reporters) cheered the likes of Dane Cook and Shaq at the Warner Bros. premier last week, the scary-skinny ingenue was met with near silence — and she’s Lois Lane!

Bosworth cocooned herself in a fortress of solitude and refused to talk to non-TV reporters, with the exception of one particularly tenacious scribe who said she was, well, “bitchy.”

“She was cold and skinny and uncomfortable,” another reporter told us. “And she looked like death.”

Can Lois Lane be revived from a skinny bitchy death coma? Looks like a job for Superman!

Oh, wait…