House & Home, Fakeout Version


It’s Thursday, which for us, all too often, ends up being the read-the-House-and-Home-section-and-kick-ourselves-for-not-thinking-of-that-story day. It’s also generally a day for abject criticism, but we’re going to be gentle with the Gray Lady in light of the recent corporate news. Lots of stuff about preservation and restoration and destroyed cities and an area of the world called Netherlands. So we’re not sure if it was the blah of the rest, but shockingly, this week’s favorite story was from that section about the, um, green things, right, plants. It makes sense given we were only one of many to jump on the Susan Orlean bandwagon when The Orchid Thief came out, and even found Nicolas Cage watchable in the adaptation, Adaptation (Side note service journalism: do not see Lord of War. You would think it impossible to make a boring movie about gun running. It is not.) but this is actually a very cool little vignette about a guy who got blindfolded in New Jersey.

When Neill Heath, a conservationist and fund-raiser employed by the Nature Conservancy, handed me a neatly folded bandanna one afternoon last month, I assumed it was to wipe my sweaty brow in the 95-degree heat. In fact, it was meant as a blindfold.

Nice… NYT, getting saucy.

Along with six other guests of the conservancy, I was required to cover my eyes for rides between locations in the heart of the Pine Barrens, in south central New Jersey, where rare blooming orchids had been spotted. The intention, of course, was to keep their whereabouts a secret, thereby protecting them from poachers.

Teasing. Bitches.