Microsoft goes postal on Google with this amusing anti-Gmail video, apparently created by the Microsoft Office 365 team when they weren't too busy developing products of their own to crash our desktops and generally darken our lives. "Gmail Man" doesn't just deliver mail. He sifts through every message for words and phrases that Google AdWords can use for ad targeting. Or, as his theme-song explains, "Probing every sentence and all your punctuation/Got his nose in every colon and every situation." Every colon. Ouch. There's more silly humor in an office vignette where Gmail Man serves an ointment ad to a woman who proceeds to explain that her Gmails have been sorely misinterpreted and she doesn't, in fact, have hemorrhoids. The clip—played for attendees at the annual Microsoft Global Exchange sales conference on July 20—has surfaced just as Gmail launches its "Email Intervention" effort, designed to get users of Microsoft's Hotmail and other services to switch by suggesting those rival platforms are hopelessly uncool and passé. Frankly, that might be a greater motivator for change than Microsoft's approach. As far as trusting tech giants with our privacy, I think we can all agree that Facebook is the only safe way to go!