YouTube has nice self-serving copyright protection plan in the works. The company is asking content producers to provide master copies of their clips, so YouTube can study their “unique characteristics” and detect unauthorized copies on the site. Producers then have the option of asking YouTube to pull the rogue videos—or, as the Los Angeles Times so succinctly puts it, “slap ads on the clips to promote them.” YouTube claims it won’t post the master copies. But hey, if the entire Twentieth Century Fox catalog happens to show up online, who’s to say how it got there? Now that it’s posted, let’s just slap an ad on it! My theory: Robots are behind the whole plan. These metal fiends all have basically the same unique characteristics: metal claws, transistorized brains and the desire to obliterate the human race. Soon, all video vestiges of the iron-plated cads will vanish, leaving humans less informed about their evil ways and more vulnerable to attack. And why won’t that shave-bot return my calls?
—Posted by David Gianatasio