Sox need more Wallys? Put me in, coach!

Wally
According to the Boston Herald: "To cope with increasing requests for public appearances, the Red Sox have sent out a call for job seekers willing to don Wally the Green Monster’s costume part time for community and corporate events." I’m throwing my cap into the ring, but I’m a little concerned about some of the job requirements. I’ve never worked as a sports mascot, theme-park character or actor—but I talk back to the screen at movies and trick-or-treated as Underdog when I was 6, so I should be OK. I’ve also acted like a journalist for nearly 20 years—a finely nuanced performance that’s fooled readers nationwide. It says applicants should be able to cope with wearing the 50-pound Wally suit in boiling heat. No worries. In fact, that’s my leading qualification: I won’t need the costume or makeup because, frankly, I’ve really let myself go these past few years.

—Posted by David Gianatasio