A friend of mine, inspired and amused by the Cartoon Network scare in Boston, sent me this friendly catalog of other potentially dangerous objects. Note the presence of the Banana Phone, first unleashed upon innocent taxpayers by a terrorist operative who boasted, in a recording, that his device was not only cellular but modular, with certain models being interactive-odular. And that’s not the worst of it. Even as we speak, some of our own citizens are willingly carrying bio-hazardous, explosive nightmares about their persons—usually hidden within afros. At this rate, it’s a good thing I live in a concrete walled basement. And those jars of urine will pay for themselves after all.
—Posted by David Kiefaber