Wow, where to start with Charles Haeberle, who has taken out an ad offering $5,000 to any woman who would agree to marry him. Paid in installments. Yes, after years of searching for love in bars, churches, and on the Internet—the worst places on earth to pick up women, by the way—Charles has resorted to full-on bribery. Which isn’t so bad, really. There are people on Craigslist right now who would spend more to do much worse. But the real kicker is that Haeberle, a 39-year-old man, is looking for a woman “between the ages of 23 and 43.” Really, he can pretty much forget about women in their 20s. But that kind of romantic ambition shows that for someone who barely sounds capable of approaching a woman, Charlie’s got balls.
—Posted by David Kiefaber