When Patton Oswalt described a grotesquely gluttonous meal in his fake ad for Black Angus Steakhouse way back in 2004, the up-and-coming comedian surely didn't intend for it to ever be made. But this week, one of Oswalt's fans stepped up to the challenge and posted a photo gallery of his creation—a full feast of Oswalt's own design.
It was an accomplishment worthy of note by Oswalt himself. "This psycho cooked—in reality—EVERY SINGLE ITEM from my 'Black Angus' bit for his friend's bachelor party," the comedian posted yesterday on Facebook. While the photos aren't exactly well-lit or appetizing, they seem just about as appealing as Oswalt probably intended them to be.
The video below contains the audio of Oswalt's original ad. After the jump, check out the photos and how they compare with Oswalt's original description.
Warning: The video clip is probably NSFW. (But the photos below are fine.)
"At Black Angus, we’ll start you off with our appetizer platter, featuring five jumbo deep-fried Gulf shrimp, served on a disc of salted butter, with 15 of our potato-bacon bombs and a big bowl of pork cracklins with our cheese-and-butter dippin’ sauce."
“Then we'll take you to our mile-long soup and salad bar featuring bacon-and-cheese cream soup and our five head of iceberg lettuce He-Man salad served in a punch bowl with 18 pounds of ranch dressing, pork-stuffed deep fried croutons and, what the hell, a couple of corn dogs!”
“Then we’ll wheel out our bottomless trough of fried dough.”
"Then we’ll bring out our 55-ounce Los Mesa He-Man steak slab, served with a deep-fried pumpkin, stuffed with buttered scallops and 53 of our potato-bacon bombs.”
“And then bend over, Abigail Mae, cause here comes the gravy pipe!”
“At Black Angus, your name is Peaches.”
Hat tip to my friend Sherri Ross Walters for sharing this on Facebook.