I need to tweak to my 100%-true memoir

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Dear Big Publisher:
  Thanks for accepting my 100-percent true-life memoir for publication! In the interests of full truthiness, I mean truthfulness, which some memoirists have trouble with, here are some last-minute changes to the manuscript:
  • Please change title My Secret Life With the CIA, Osama and the Street Gangs to Couch Journal: Why I Never Left My Parents’ House.
  • All references to “guns,” “knives” and “karate” should now read: “soup spoons,” “tweezers” and “tai chi in the park until I hurt my back,” respectively.



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