Dr Pepper’s lonely heart’s club brand

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I can’t wait for Dr Pepper Bad in a Bubble to debut on MTV later this month. Sorry, the show’s actual title is Dr Pepper BAND in a Bubble—I must have flashed forward to the reviews. Rock band Cartel (no hint of a sellout in that name) will be locked inside a huge sphere for a few weeks to record their new album. Can you imagine Jim Morrison doing a stunt like this? He’d have emerged wasted, slathered in Crisco and singing the Dr Pepper jingle (which, by the way, would’ve sent sales through the roof). Does this show employ “lifelines”? Can Cartel dial up inspiration from Sammy Hagar or groupies if their creativity ebbs? Maybe they’ll emerged in full KISS makeup or Sgt. Pepper regalia. That’d be kind of cool. I wish MTV would get back to me on my rock ’n’ roll reality-show pilot: Survivor: Survivor. We strand the ’80s “Eye of the Tiger” group on a remote island to record their next album. If they never made it back, who’d notice?

—Posted by David Gianatasio