David Beckham’s Latest H&M Ads: Less Skin, More Porn ‘Stache

Still, beggars can't be choosers

Most of the time I say, "Screw you, H&M!" Screw your pseudo-celebrity ad campaign with the laconic, tone-deaf Lana Del Rey. And screw your limited-time, impossible-to-get discount duds from hotshot designers slumming it at fast-fashion retail. That $349 puffy duvet coat from Maison Martin Margiela that goes on sale next week looks like it came from the Michelin Man's closet, by the way. But when you bring back David Beckham in all his Adonis-like glory—that would be his tighty-whities—I must give credit where it's due. You previously launched his underwear line with similar black-and-white ads of his chiseled-from-granite physique. Why mess with perfection? You even bought him a Super Bowl spot. Victory dance! This time around, for his expanded collection of bodywear and comfy clothes, he's slightly more covered up. He's sporting a porn 'stache and, in my opinion, some unnecessary fabric. But there's still a money shot. So thanks, H&M, for this early holiday gift.