Crotches have been lethal for God knows how long. But traffic-safety officials in Alberta, Canada, are using new ads to highlight the most recent source of groin-related fatalities: subversive texting. In its new "Crotches Kill" campaign, Alberta's Transportation Department reminds motorists that every time you check that phone in your lap, your attention strays from the road for five seconds. "We know what you're doing down there," say the posters, part of an effort by agency RED that includes radio spots and banner ads as well. In somewhat related news, Rhode Island is also considering a law to ban pets from sitting in drivers' laps. We might just be entering an era of crotch common sense! Via Osocio and Copyranter.