The most chilling aspect of these faux classified ads seeking torturers, kidnappers and abusers (via U.K.-based Freedom From Torture and Ogilvy & Mather) is how seamlessly business clichés and job-recruitment jargon mesh with detailed yet detached descriptions of inhuman behavior. One ad notes that "our ideal candidate is experienced in violence and inflicting extreme pain and suffering. Daily work will involve punching, kicking, slapping, whipping and prolonged constraint of movement. Familiarity with positional torture, including using suspension (wires and/or ropes) to stretch limbs apart is an advantage." Those selected will have the satisfaction of working with a "unique group of professionals" as they "inspire a small but enthusiastic team to go beyond what they ever believed possible." The campaign, running in actual help-wanted sections but clearly designed to generate broader media attention, reminds us that for various groups and regimes around the world, torture is, quite literally, business as usual—a job to be done and nothing more. Sadly, if these ads were real, there'd be no shortage of qualified professionals, with unpadded résumés, eager to apply. Two more ads after the jump. Via Boing Boing.