Trifling With Mr. Claus, Dens of Matrimony, Outing Your Wardrobe
You know we live in a world gone mad when even Santa Claus gets dissed. A new spot for Crate & Barrel transforms the saintly gift giver into a second-story man. First, we see Santa putting gifts under a tree, as tradition dictates. Next, he turns his attention to the glass of milk and plate of cookies thoughtfully left out for him. Instead of drinking the milk, though, he dumps it into a potted plant and pockets the glass. Then, he feeds the cookies to the family dog and sticks the plate into his red suit. A voiceover explains that everyone wants something from Crate & Barrel for Christmas. The folks at McConnaughy Stein Schmidt Brown in Chicago can expect coal in their stockings for this one. Also taking liberties with the jolly one is a spot for the Oregon Lottery’s Holiday Scratch-Its game. In the umpteenth Martha Stewart parody we’ve seen this season, a woman advises viewers on making a homemade gift for the holidays: a “turkey-face Santa” composed of a turkey carcass, rubber cement and other odds and ends. At the end, a voiceover suggests you give people what they really want: a lottery ticket that might make them rich.
Moffatt/Rosenthal of Portland, Ore., came up with this spot.

Just when you thought it was safe to go to the bar, Bride’s illuminates the perils of doing so: You might end up married. Asked where they met Mr. Right, 8 percent of participants in a reader poll said they did so at a bar or club. The most common ways of meeting future spouses were through school (23 percent), friends (22 percent) or work (17 percent).

When people come out of the proverbial closet, you’d think they would have closet space to spare–thus enabling them to become out-and-proud pack rats. But a poster for a secondhand shop that benefits the AIDS Action Committee suggests otherwise, urging its readers not to emerge from those closets empty-handed. Mullen of Wenham, Mass., created the piece.