How To Truly Act The Part

The Ad Guy Starter Kit, available online at adguystarterkit.com, is marketed Ronco style with an online commercial demonstrating how pitch abuse (“You call this creative?”) can be remedied—not for $1,000, not for $500, not even for $200, but for four easy payments of $24.95. The kit includes a “water-resistant dickie” and “your own soul patch, crafted of the finest Italian beaver hair” (which, as graphics demonstrate, emits “creativity” in four different directions), as well as horn-rim glasses that don’t just look sharp but actually cut tomatoes with ease.