Given its name, ad agency Mother has a daunting responsibility when it comes to Mother's Day campaigns. This year, it has launched a suitably heroic effort—a campaign to help moms literally get paid back for those nine months of hell known as pregnancy and the agony of labor and delivery. The American Coalition for Labor Reparations, set up by Mother, has a very helpful form where you can "calculate and repay the expenses you incurred as a fetus." These include, but are not limited to, a base labor fee (for the hours spent trying to push you out of her body); embarrassment, weight gain and emotional instability during pregnancy; and stretch marks and navel disorders discovered later. There are other costs, and a few possible deductions, so please read the form carefully. Mom deserved better than this. Now you can make things right.