The Alamo Drafthouse theater in Austin, Texas, is showing a film that packs a wallop, but it's not Kung Fu Panda 2 or X-Men: First Class. It's a PSA warning folks not to talk or text, and it features a profane and entertaining voicemail left by a peeved patron who was kicked out after breaking the rule. Her indignant rant, presented in a short that runs before R-rated flicks, sounds like something David Mamet might write in a bitchy stupor. This Texty Tina from Texas whines, "It was too fucking dark in that place for me to find my seat—all right? I was using my phooone as a flashlight to get to my fuckin' seat." She basically reveals herself to be a liar (and the rudest moviegoer in town) by adding, "I've texted in all the other theaters in Austin, and no one ever gave a fuck." Also, her claim that the "Magnited States of America" guarantees citizens the right to text in a "the-a-ter" is way funnier than the crap Jack Black regularly spews on the big screen. Remember, the Alamo will bounce your ass for talking on the phone or texting! Via Boing Boing.